Pope said to be Suffering from Mystery Illness!

Possibly the first evidence of the Popes mysterious illness.
Possibly the first evidence of the Popes mysterious illness.

Vatican – The Bastard has discovered that Pope Paedophile Benedict XVI is suffering from a bizarre medical condition thought to be related to Gilles de la Tourette’s syndrome, that is baffling his doctors.

The first attack happened during a meeting of the Popes inner council were discussing the Strategy to avoid any responsibility for the actions of Paedophile priests in Belgium and the United States when the Pope suddenly stood up and shot his right fist in the air and uttered a high pitched squawk in a strange falsetto voice before passing out.

Since then The Pope has been getting these attacks more regularly and has simultaneously started to grab his crotch with his Left hand.

Although in almost all but one aspect the Pope seems normal, then suddenly he grabs his own crotch and shouts “Mother Fucker!” in a twisted falsetto voice.

Vatican doctors are convinced that Pope Benedict XVI is suffering from a form of Tourette’s syndrome.

From the Wikipedia: Simply Tourette’s or TS) is an inherited neuropsychiatric disorder with onset in childhood, characterized by multiple physical (motor) tics and at least one vocal (phonic) tic; these tics characteristically wax and wane. Tourette’s is defined as part of a spectrum of tic disorders, which includes transient and chronic tics.

It is understood that the Popes mystery illness will not stop the his visit to the United Kingdom in September.

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Author: Dr Suusi Watson

Editor of the Bastard

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