ED Miliband finds his missing testicles!

3001UK – In a big political surprise Blue Labor™ leader Ed Miliband had a good rummage in his underpants and discovered that he really did have some testicles after all.

It was widely believed in the Westminster village that Ed Miliband was a eunuch. Rumours to this effect stated when he first became leader of the Blue Labor™ party. His utter failure to oppose the conservatives in their evil pogrom launched against the most vulnerable is society. Had led members of his own party to conclude that Ed Miliband was devoid of both a backbone and testicles.

It may be that his political position is being undermined by the remnants of the Blairites and the Brownites who inflicted ATOS tests on the disabled and mentally ill. Too scared to oppose the Tories in case he was called a hypocrite for supporting Browns ATOS but opposing the Tories use of the very same company against the disabled and mentally ill.

Well come the moment come the man as the saying goes. In opposing ‘little dave’ Cameron and ‘Little Willy’ Hague’s rush to war in Syria, and demanding that we see the evidence from the united nations weapons inspectors, before agreeing to an attack on Syria.

Pow, out of nowhere Miliband’s testicles reappear where they should be, instead of on a jam jar full of surgical alcohol on the mantelpiece.

We at the Bastard thought fuck me, he has at last remembered what the leader of the opposition job is all about. Blair beat Major because he opposed the Tories at every measure, putting clear blue water between the two political parties.

So now Ed Miliband oppose the Tories and stop being scared of the Daily Mail Nazi’s headlines and remember that their readers are mental retards for whom compassion is another country.

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Author: Dr Suusi Watson

Editor of the Bastard

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