Chris Grayling Announces Flagship Prison Reform Policy.

3164UK – Another day another new flagship policy announcement from the Conservative Party. As if we are not utterly board with the drivel emanating from the political parties in the run up to the May 2015.

But this one rather caught or attention. It appears that the idea of reforming prisoners has finally encountered the cold cynical men in the city.

The prisons have some ageing prisoners, who are not a danger to people any more. Is very likely that they will die in prison. They also have a number of exploitable skills. Why not exploit them in order to offset the cost of their incarceration? Especially as they are expecting an influx of potential music teachers and at least one artist come music teacher.

It is with this in mind that the Lord Chancellor and Secretary of State for Justice Chris Grayling is to announce that elderly prisoners will be hired out to local schools as mentors and teachers.

This looks like a sound idea after all what sort of trouble could someone in their sixties and seventies get up to?

Right up to the point that you look at some recent cases involving older men of just that age. A quick scan of the the headlines of recent convictions of people in that age group starts the alarm bells ringing like a gang of demented campanologists on PCP!

Imagine the scene in the prison where Rolf Harris and Garry Glitter are held when they are told that they are to become music teachers in a girls prep school!

On the plus side there is a serious chance they they will masturbate themselves to death before the night is over. On the other hand there is a serious chance of them taking advantage of their new charges.

We shudder to think of the reaction of the parents to Garry Glitter calling out, “Do you want to be in my Gang?”

You can bet that they will be forming a lynch mob and heading towards the Justice department after burning Glitter at the stake!

At this point it is tempting to think that this is a sick joke. We wish it was but it typifies the deranged thinking of the Lord Chancellor and the Conservative leadership.

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Author: Dr Suusi Watson

Editor of the Bastard

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