Kellogg’s secret Ingredient finally revealed

Kellogg's secret ingredient revealed
Kellogg’s secret ingredient revealed: Fresh Urine on draft.

USA – For years the Breakfast Cereal company Kellogg’s has been obsessively secretive about the recipes and production processes used to make their products.

This obsession dates back to the company’s founder, militant vegetarian and child mutilator John Harvey Kellogg, M.D.

This secretive state of affairs was brought to abrupt end when a person or persons unknown uploaded part of one of the company’s security tapes to the World Star Hip Hop website.

This unprecedented breach of data security the company is said to be in turmoil , and there is an enormous effort underway to find out how the highly incriminating security footage of the adding of the secret ingredient found its way onto world wide web.

Company Lawyers promptly descended on the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) to try and locate the source of the leak.

They also visited the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to try and salvage something of the company’s reputation and more importantly preserve the shareholders capital holdings.

Investors advisors in Wall Street told us that they felt that the company officers were taking the piss and that heads will have to roll.

The Bastard will of course keep you up to date with the latest developments.

 

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Author: Dr Suusi Watson

Editor of the Bastard

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