May Announces Don’t Care in the Community 2!

Theresa May – announcing her improvements to the mental health system in England and Wales. Scotland and Northern Ireland being seen as beyond the pale.

UK – Prime minister Theresa May has announced that the is going to do more to help the mentally ill. More to help ease the mentally ill into work and more for children with mental health issues.

To this end she has asked Jeremy Hunt to close all the residential mental hospitals and secure hospitals after transfer the patients to the prison system. Where they can receive the type of treatment best suited to their needs.

The land that the former mental hospitals were built on can then be sold to the Conservative donors for housing. With prior granted planning permission for sub standard homes with inadequate facilities.

When queried about the therapeutic value of these changes. Theresa May said that she had asked her colleges of their views and that Evelyn Waugh’s maxin from Decline and Fall. “Anyone who had survived being at an English Public School would be quite at home in prison.”

As most Conservative MPs are the product of the English public school and have the likelihood of going to prison if they get caught. The policy seems sound to them.

These reforms will only apply to England and Wales. As the government is of the opinion that Scotland and Northern Ireland are so far beyond the pale as to be not worth the effort.

It is understood but unspoken that Theresa May would prefer a more final solution for the Scots and the Irish.

Theresa May believes that giving the mentally ill regular access to the prison work system without the distractions of life on the outside is bound to improve the mental health of the former patients.

Further she believes that the mental health of children would be improved if they were apprenticed to chimney sweeps and market traders.

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Author: Dr Suusi Watson

Editor of the Bastard

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