Let crippled Porkeron carry on as PM

Pigs head
Pigs head – Can Cameron resist?

UK – The release of the Panama Papers, and the rapidly evolving scandal associated with it, is now is serious in danger of claiming some very high profile people.

It is not just David Porkeron who is at risk. Now the scalp of Porkeron’s anointed one Gideon Osborne is beginning to look distinctly vulnerable. especially after Iain Dummkopf Schmitt’s suicide bombing of both him and his budget, allegedly over the cuts to disability benefits. Continue reading “Let crippled Porkeron carry on as PM”

EU wants the UK to Quit

Referendum on whether Britain should remain in the European Union to be held on Thursday 23 June.
Referendum on whether Britain should remain in the European Union to be held on Thursday 23 June.

EU – In another The Bastard exclusive our European correspondent Zoot Allures has discovered that the EU is secretly funding and providing technical advice to the Britexit campaign.

It appears that the other members of the EU collectively Continue reading “EU wants the UK to Quit”

Terror Police to Target Disabled Ex Servicemen

Armed Police carrying Heckler and Koch G36 assault rifles and 9mm Glock pistols.
Armed Police carrying Heckler and Koch G36 assault rifles and 9mm Glock pistols.

UK – Every time that you think that the Conservative Government could not sink any lower, they disappoint you. It has been reported in SENTINEL NEWS that the Police are now targeting Disabled Ex Servicemen and Servicewomen as potential terrorists. Continue reading “Terror Police to Target Disabled Ex Servicemen”

C of E in Moral Panic Meltdown!

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Conservative christians reveling in the misery that they have inflicted on the poor sick and disabled.
UK – The recent suicide bombing of Gideon Osborne by the Prince of Darkness Iain Dummkopf Schmitt has brought a rare moment of clarity to the members of the Church of England.

Now the Church of England is Continue reading “C of E in Moral Panic Meltdown!”

Dinosaurs looking for a new Keyboard Player!

Greg Lake and Carl Palmer next to Keith Emerson’s skull.

USA – Following the tragic death of Keyboard player Keith Emerson on the 10 March 2016. His fellow band mates, Greg Lake and Carl Palmer, are looking for someone to replace him in ELP

When interviewed by The Bastard‘s music correspondent Greg Lake and Continue reading “Dinosaurs looking for a new Keyboard Player!”

In Pakistan Terrorism is just Politics!

Many of the bomb victims were children at a funfair in the Gulshan-i-Iqbal park Lahore
Many of the bomb victims were children at a funfair in the Gulshan-i-Iqbal park Lahore

Pakistan – Once again terrorists in have have created the headlines in Pakistan. This time some of the victims are Christian women and children in a public park in Lahore.

Once again the headlines are predictable and the same old Continue reading “In Pakistan Terrorism is just Politics!”

ECHR: de Menezes Death Squad Cover Up Legal!

Jean Charles de Menezes
Jean Charles de Menezes – murdered in an extrajudicial execution in Stockwell tube station 22 July 2007 by armed officers of the Metropolitan police.

ECHR – The British Government has finally got the verdict that they have spent years bulling the ECHR for.

The ECHR has ruled on the side of the British government on the investigation and death into the Jean Charles da Silva e de Menezes. The Brazilian man who Continue reading “ECHR: de Menezes Death Squad Cover Up Legal!”

Hulk Hogan to spend $115 million on Penis enlargement

Terry Bollea AKA Hulk Hogan
Terry Bollea AKA Hulk Hogan

USA – A  jury in Florida has awarded Terry Bollea, known to his legion of adoring fans as Hulk Hogan, $115m (£79m) after the gossip news website Gawker published a sex tape of the retired professional wrestler.

The sex tape tape published on Gawker was one of three films Continue reading “Hulk Hogan to spend $115 million on Penis enlargement”

Iain Dummkopf Schmitt buries the Gidiot’s chances of becoming PM!

Iain Duncan Smith cheers at the prospect of vulnerable people being killed
Iain Duncan Smith cheers at the prospect of vulnerable people being killed. He has now resigned from the cabinet over cuts to disability benefits.

UK – We at the Bastard have occaisionally underestimated people in the political world.In this case it appears that we have with Iain Dummkopf Schmitt.

Who is said by people who have worked with him in the past to be the the stupidest ex guardsman from a regiment noted for its Continue reading “Iain Dummkopf Schmitt buries the Gidiot’s chances of becoming PM!”