UK – The piece of software that is used in the preparation of The Bastard is set to be re-released shortly for use on Unix computers. A spokes geek on behalf of the publishers, Somniferum Happy IT Oy, said that a re-release was necessary because the majority of their clients were to mean to buy Continue reading “Groundbreaking software to be re-released”
UK – Teachers in the UK are set to get a pay rise of a wapping (same as wopping but on a Cell Phone) 3%. It may not sound much, but it is vastly more than the sadistic evil scumbags. After all, they say that if you can remember a good teacher it is because they are so fucking rare – teaching is an industry that attracts sadists and hitler’s like Continue reading “Teachers to get pay-rise”
Arch prince of hell and leader of the ‘Conservative Party’, Ian Bunkum Smith has announced that ‘only women can save the Conservative Party’. By this piece of nonsense, intended as a means of attracting voters without actually having to so anything, he means of course that women should be encouraged to stand for safe Tory seats. IBS was keen to explain that he did not mean that women are to stupid or pathetic to take and hold unsafe Tory seats.
A leading tory backbencher who prefers not to be named* said that the thought of their being more nubile young women at the tory party conference made him feel very happy. IBS himself refuted accusations that the ‘Widdecombe babes’ were not going to be mere automatons modelled after the Labour Party’s infamous babe-bevy, but would be more like the successful independent women of today, ie lapdancers.